This one is a doozy! Maybe “doozy” isn’t quite accurate. It falls into the “your actions just proved your point” category. I recorded a video about self-forgiveness back in October and never felt like it was the right time to share it. I decided to revisit the video and was equal parts critical and ok with it.

Let’s start with what’s ok with it. It’s a relevant message. We are all self-critical and it’s time to evaluate whether our negative thoughts and stories are serving us. It’s authentic and vulnerable. I promised myself I would show who I am in my posts. It shares some hard truths that you will relate to in some way.

And then…I went to the critical. I don’t look my best. I’m repetitive. The lighting and positioning could be better. I wish I had filmed it horizontally. Maybe I should re-record it? Do I want this out in the world if it is not up to par? You wrote about this topic in a previous post. Essentially, I was proving the point of the video. We are our own worst critics, and the negative self-talk is real.

I pushed myself to evaluate it again from my heart instead of my head…

Forgiveness is a BIG topic. We often hear about the importance of forgiving others—how carrying anger and resentment is a heavy load. Forgiveness lightens that emotional load. But what about forgiving yourself?

I’ve thought about this a lot. When I asked myself, "What do I need to forgive myself for?" a long list came to mind. I need to forgive myself for all the harsh things I’ve believed about myself. The inner voice that says I’m not smart enough, I weigh too much, I don’t always make the best choices, I didn’t follow through, I judged someone unfairly, I didn’t show enough kindness or empathy. The list seems endless. Writing it down is tough, but it’s necessary and it brings clarity.

So why am I so hard on myself? I know I’m not alone in this. Many of us have an inner critic that’s harsh and unforgiving. It’s important to explore where these thoughts come from. Understanding the root of your self-criticism is the first step toward dismantling it. Are these beliefs even true? Sure, some things may hold some truth—we all have moments of impatience or judgment—but they don’t have to define us. We’re human, after all, and humans are not perfect.

So, where do we go from there? How do we move beyond self-sabotaging thoughts and head toward self-forgiveness?